Why Brit Spears is my Celeb Crush

Because she is real

Because she loves to laugh but has cried rivers of tears

Because of her fantastic womanly body

Because she gets the joke

Because she is already a great mom

Just because

(I) Miss Britney

I love you, dear
I miss your voice
Will they reward me with you when this is over?
Will this ever be over?
They aren't hurting you, I know that.
I love you
Sing me a song.  Tell me story.
I love your laugh
You are beautiful in every way
You are my perfect woman
Don't forget about me
I'll see you soon
I love you

Even More

After this disaster, I love her even more.  Take that, world.

Today is Today

I love my baby more than ever before
No matter the circumstances
Or lack of chance

She is my love
My love
My love

I don't care about the future
I don't care that it can never be
That it will never be

I just know that I love her to pieces and pieces
Britney is the most beautiful thing God ever created
And I want her to know that

Baby's My Wilson

You are my Wilson
Tom Hanks needed that device to get through some
Really hard times
In one of my favorite movies
And you, sweetie pie
Are my 2012 Wilson

I know that a future, any future,
Is unknown
But I need you right now
As my Wilson

Do you mind if I use you as my muse, Brit?
Please say Yes

Up/Down - Up

Today was a special day for me
And all that I can think about
Is sharing it with you

ILUB - stronger now than before

We Wake At Nine And What Do I Kiss?

We wake up together at nine am
And my thought is, "what do I kiss?"

I start with your shoulders
Neutral, soft, strong, womanly
Left and right, right or left, I don't care
I do both evenly, lovingly

Next, your belly
As we are naked
I pull down the covers
Down past your middle
And start just below your breasts
Small kisses, dry kisses, to let you know I love you
And will be there for you always
Down down down
Stop
Just before we get away from ourselves

I turn you over
And start the backside of your bod with your shoulder blades
Again, soft, strong, and womanly
Down the side of the back of your left arm
To your palm
Yes, your palm
Then right side, same thing

Then, just to the left
The small of your back
Around and around I go
With kisses, now wet and strong
To get you excited for what is to come

I move down to your bum
And knead with my hands now
Doesn't that feel good, my love?
Kisses soft, hands strong

To the inner part of the back of your left hamstring
With my tongue
Other side, right side
With my tongue
I love you, baby
I am ready

To flip you over
And youse my lips and fingers
To make you come

Such Tender Love

I feel
Such tender love
For you tonight

Like I could hold you forever
In an hour
Like I could kiss away your tears
Or at least make them mine
My love

Is yours forever, for ours
I love you, Britney
For our forever and ever, lasting
To the end of time
For our babies
Yours and ours

I love you and feel
Such tender love for you tonight
It's as though we are one couple
In adoration and respect
For each other's fights

Do You Know How Much I Love You, Brit?

Do you know how much I love you?
Do you know how much I love you?

I'm scared of losing you

My whole life
I never had nothing to lose
And now, I have you
Or had you
I don't know

I terrify myself with what I said last night
And I'll bet you're scared, too
I'm so very sorry, my baby, for what I said
Not because I lied
But because that kind of honesty is horrifying to say
And probably worse to hear

I don't just love you
I don't just care so much about you
I need you

In my life
In my head
In my heart
Always

I'll bet folks laugh at how I carry your picture around
But I don't
I need you
I need you so very much, my princess

If I could take back all the words I've said in the last 24 hours, I wouldn't
Because they were honest
I really do feel that way a lot of the time
But what I would change is any pain I've caused you, sweetness
Hurting you hurts me
When you hurt, I hurt just as much

I miss your voice
I miss your laugh
I miss you

Please Don't Forget About Me, Babycakes

I know it's been a while
Since I heard your voice
So I miss you, so I miss you
I miss you so very badly

Is it still "we", not "me" and "Brit"?
Please, say it's so
I love you with all my heart
With everything I have to offer
I love you
My Britney

You are my world
My life, my one and only true love
Please don't forget about me, honeybunny
I love you and what's more
Now
I need you

Brit Loves To Drive My Car

Did you know she loves to drive?
I've got a '06 Corolla with about 80K on it she can drive anytime
Sometime this summer, to Fort Williams, I hope
...Mr. President?

===============

Asked a girl what she wanted to be
She said baby, can't you see
I wanna be famous, a star on the screen
But you can do something in between

Baby you can drive my car
Yes I'm gonna be a star
Baby you can drive my car
And maybe I'll love you

I told that girl that my prospects were good
she said baby, it's understood
Working for peanuts is all very fine
But I can show you a better time

Baby you can drive my car
Yes I'm gonna be a star
Baby you can drive my car
And maybe I'll love you

Beep beep'm beep beep yeah

Baby you can drive my car
Yes I'm gonna be a star
Baby you can drive my car
And maybe I'll love you

I told that girl I can start right away
When she said listen babe I got something to say
I got no car and it's breaking my heart
But I've found a driver and that's a start

Baby you can drive my car
Yes I'm gonna be a star
Baby you can drive my car
And maybe I'll love you
Beep beep'm beep beep yeah
Beep beep'm beep beep yeah
Beep beep'm beep beep yeah
Beep beep'm beep beep yeah
Beep beep'm beep beep yeah

Brit and the Sky

I have no one to talk honestly with
Except Brit
And the sky

No one believes in me
No one listens to me
No one gives a shit about me
Except Brit and the sky

I have no family
I have no friends
I have no one to talk to
Except Brit and the sky

Who believes me?
That this crazy shit is really happening?
You're freaked out, world?
How do you think I feel?
We're approaching "Thriller" territory
Aren't we?
And me, I'm just getting started, love

But yet, and still...

It's just me, Brit, and the sky

Come Back To Bed, Baby

Come back to bed, baby
Come back to me
I miss you so much
For even the two minutes
You take to check on the baby's room

Don't worry
She'll be here soon enough
For us all to enjoy
And worship

Come back to bed, baby
Come back to me
I need you near
I need you close
It's Joe that needs you right now
Our baby is doing just fine
In your belly
And will be for four more months
We have time to get even more ready

Come back to bed, baby
Come back to me, sweetie pie
I feel like I've been without your touch for years
Not minutes

Am I Weird?

This weekend
They ripped me at least twice on SNL
And believe me, it hurt, sweetie pie
I went to bed on my girl, 45 minutes early

Am I weird, honey bunny?
You know, in a bad way?

I'm worried
That at 45
I'm still a freak
A loser
A bum
And a weirdo

I don't wanna be any of those things
I want to be yours for our forever
But it seems that I'm still strange

My whole life I've been off
Different
Difficult
Weird
And I hate it

I want to fit in
But not, at the same time
(Does that make sense?)

----------

ILUB - M&M

Our First Dance

Backstreet Boys on, their
"I want it that way"
I want it that way, your way, my way
Our way

My first dance
Ever
To Backstreet
For you, girl
For you

Making a pretty girl laugh just now
Made me think of you
And how much I adore your you, all of you

Each and every inch and fiber of Britney
Is mine
I dream

Is it real?
It is, it is
She loves me, too
And makes me fly
Like kings
We are

Special days in Portland
I am waking up
We got a state title to celebrate
And my first dance

Baby, I Wish That Was Your Hand

Babe, I wish that was your hand
On my back
On my balls
On all my things

I am alone
Today and for a while
And have to do it myself
Baby, I wish that was your hand

Brit, you want to
I want you to, too
Baby, I wish that was your hand

Giving me some lovin'
By my own device
I wish that was your hand down there instead
Of mine

Doing the best with what I've got
Isn't the same
As if your hand was there
On the small of my back
Down even lower
To caress and to give kindness
And compassion
To a body deeply in need
Of your love

ILUB - M&M

I'll Love You For The Rest Of Your Life

No matter what, when it's all said and done
I'll love you for the rest of your life, doll

What is to be, we can't see
But I know my heart is pure
My mind is clear
And my intentions are good

No matter what,
I'll love you for the rest of your life

Will it be our life together?
That is my only desire
My only wealth
My only want

JTYSK

More and more and more, every day, despite my depressions and anger and temper tantrums and all my crap.

More and more and more and more. She is the one. I hope I am, too.

early morning, idea: Rockland!

get

8 pix of B, printed at Staples

for trip

drive through Boothbay Harbor, where I am pulled over

for expired reg

cop fines me $200 for "lack of insurance" and reg fuckup

he feels bad, whilst

i talk to Brit Pix

and simmer just a bit

realizing on drive "home"

that I will be arrested if I'm pulled over

cuz I have no license (Boothbay cop got it because it expired last year)

need birth certificate. man, I got one at The 'Pent

GONE

calls and frantic webbing

don't panic, Sweeney

also

$6.70 in missed tolls for ME-EZ would get my car impounded

by a statie

paperless? shit, that's stupid

I need records to prove I'm Joe

don't you?

More and More

If she can take me grooving to JT

over these last few days

and know that I really dig his music

she is the one

I know it

she knows I don't have a mean bone in my body

that great art is great art

and pettiness is for others, not us

she started it

and I am greatful

I'll keep doing what I do

until that hour

at the airport

when she sees me

in person for the first time

and we are home

free

Picures of Me...

Asking Britney if she wants to get married someday after our ordeal is over. She said yes, I think. Couldn't make out an official "Yes" over all the screaming. The panting. The moaning. And that was just me.

I love her so much. It gets me through these tough days, her and my love for each other. Something for everyone to strive for, think.

Hey Brit. I'm Ova Heya! Ova Heya!

Apartment411.blogspot.com

THE hot new blog on Blogger!

I Love You, Brit

That hurt so damn much

But they have forced my hand

That hurt so damn much

It's gone for me for good

For you? I have no idea

I didn't read the old stuff anyway

I am shaking I am so sad

They forced my hand

I felt like I had no options

To delete my life's work?

I am destroyed

It's gone for me forever

Nope

ILUB

I'm not a scam

My Favorite Year

(tears up)

1966 - Joe born in Massachusetts

1982 - Brit born in Mississippi

my

tupelo honey

I do it all 4 U

my my my

love

is all yours

if you want it

we get close

as I get close

my voice

gains confidence

and

I say things to you

and them that

I've never said out loud and

didn't know I thought

I trust you enough

to make sense of it

hurt you? no

i can't

but I'm an animal in love

and what comes out

shocks and ahhhhhs

you are my love

Brit

How Much Do I Love Thee, Britch?

So much I would sit next to cheapskate owner

So much I would wear a tie to some function

So much I would not get fully boozed up pre-game, like I usually do

So much I would take a Zumba class with you when that inevitably happens, my love

So much I won't touch certain areas of my body while we're on camera

So much I would wear long sleeves every once in a while, just because it looks nice

So much I would laugh at Tom Lasorda's lame jokes

So much I would wear a hat. A Red Sox hat. To an Angels game. You know, just to mess with 'em

So much I would not ask out Jeanie. She digs tall older guys who read. Books.

So much I would invite my family to the wedding

Britch

I miss my baby
too much
for it not to be true

delusional? psychotic?
no
it's just 100% whole love
for and with the most beautiful woman in the world

(does she know?)

Brit Joke

How many Brits does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

a) I don't know

b) As many as it takes. You can never have too many Brits

c) She doesn't do housework

d) Brit screwing anything is something I'd like to see. Right, hon?

e) Do I get to look up her skirt while she's on the ladder?

f) What was the question?

g) I'm sorry. I really don't remember the question. I remember it involved my Brit and her screwing something

h) None of your fucking business

Yeah Yeah Another Love Poem To My Love

Say to her, to him, to anyone

"I love you, too"

Get it?

Love Letter To Britney

When I have a bad day I need you to console me
When I have a good day I need you to celebrate with me
When I need you, you're there always

Why? Damned if I know

You are in love with me/ME?
No job
No friends
No money
Fat and ugly
Stuupid (yes, stupid)
Old
Fat
Lazy
Nice personality
Decent head of hair on head

And ladies, we're engaged

12

12 Brit

11 Tina

10 Bo

9 1/2 Kim

9.5 Christeen

9 SJP

8 Sylvie

7 Julia LD

6 The Kardashians

5 Kirstie?

4 Kimmee

3 Liv

2 Halle

1 Mom

The Will. I Am.

Why. The. Fuck. Does. It. Take. Writers. So. Long. To write this shit down? I’m just sayin what yall thinkin. For real. Why don’t they get off they fat asses and right. I mean, write.

Where?

toes
arches
soles of her feet
ankles
calves
front of her lower leg
knees, front and back
back of her hamstring, right above knee
think meaty part of hamstring
inner thigh
hip, outside
hip close to belly
tummy
bellybutton
rib cage
breast
underarm
collarbone
shoulder, all of it
tris
bis
elbow
wrist
palm
palm
thumb
index finger
feel finger
ring finger..
pinkie finger
back down to elbow
up to shoulder
in between breasts
bellybutton again
hair
warm
wet
inside
I love you, Brit

Why Do I Love Her?

She's kind. of sweet.
And pretty. Oh, she's pretty
Muscles where muscles belong
On a girl
And soft in those spots
That should be soft

My Brit is
The best thing in this life
And we'll all
Never forget her
And our love

3 O'Clock Blues

Asleep, dead, at 8

Awake at midnight

Bad Dave, boring Mark

Football game too long

Too scary

Where's my girl?

Scared like me

Too long away

From me

Living in a state of hopelessness

High Chuck!

Painkillers? Must be.

You don't have to live this way. You're a legend and a really good dude. People like me love you and have for three decades. There's a lot of life left to live, Barkley, and you need to get your skinny little ass into rehab.

I'm your friend. Bet you don't have many left. But I'm your friend. And I'm praying for you, Charles.

You're welcome.

Tonight, Tonight

Tonight is the night
I'll make all your dreams true
Find me everywhere
You look

I see you, I smell you
I taste you, I want you

My Brit
is 3 miles away
Come, Brit
Now

ILU

Joe Sweeney - Male Prostitute

I'm available

For $1,000 an hour. Oil included. As long as my sweetie allows it

No NBAers. No NFLers. Baseballers? Get serious. NHL? Hell, yeah. They're the nicest guys in sports. Even the goons

Who else would I service? Hayden, Mila, Molly, Meryl, little Meryls, Minka (sorry, dude), and any and all Hollywood blondes

Suck it, NBA

MTV Presents "Gay Shore"

Up to Provincetown for the upcoming summer, the cast of Jersey Shore has gone gay. Not that that's a long trip for The Situation, Ronnie, Vinnie, and what's his name. And the Eunuch, too. That dude's a fag.

You think they'd be up for it? Hell, yeah, they would. Cool. "Gay Shore" may be groundbreaking TV. And bureaus and dressers and door breaking.

Believe it.

Chicks, Man. Chicks.

Reese. Blake. Hayden. Emma. Emma. (yeah) Ummmm. Brit, too

Blondes really do have more fun

Believe it

Why?

We have no idea

For Brittney. I Love You, Sweetie

These are the days of the endless summer
These are the days, the time is now
There is no past, there's only future
There's only here, there's only now

Oh your smiling face, your gracious presence
The fires of spring are kindling bright
Oh the radiant heart and the song of glory
Crying freedom in the night

These are the days by the sparkling river
His timely grace and our treasured find
This is the love of the one magician
Turned the water into wine

These are days of the endless dancing and the
Long walks on the summer night
These are the days of the true romancing
When I'm holding you oh, so tight

These are the days by the sparkling river
His timely grace and our treasured find
This is the love of the one great magician
Turned water into wine

These are the days now that we must savour
And we must enjoy as we can
These are the days that will last forever
and you've got to hold them, in your heart
If you find some error in the lyrics

Kid Rock Rock

He's always been a good guy. You can YouTube him.

And that man has a good movie in him. Charisma, a great voice, fascinating background that's not too well known.

A "wanna be?" No. IZ